Is Kisses Delavin Playing The Victim Card?

KissMarc split-up is making a buzz and being promoted (damage control or PR strategy) in certain blogs and the ABS-CBN entertainment site itself. Good and bad, big and small incidents in this time and age are considered equitably making some buzz.

With Kisses and Marco putting an end to their team-up, the questions are being thrown more on Kisses. Even before when she was still a houseguest of the infamous Big Brother house, PBB viewers have observed how she often use to play the “Victim Card” to gain sympathy. Netizens were also quick to observe, where are those people in her private life even before she was a public figure? Instances were during her 18th birthday this year. Even at the party of the most celebrated stars, you can feel the presence of regular people. But with Kisses debut, you can hardly point a private person (classmates and neighbors/childhood friends) present during the grand celebration.

Did Marco genuinely have developed some kind of more than just friends desire or was he just riding the situation for career sake? Is the affection reciprocated? Is ABS-CBN Star Magic to blame for pushing a tandem, which from the very start is doomed to fail? Marco stood frankly with his admiration with Vivoree Esclito, but the poor young man was forced to swallow and ate his words just to be matched with Kisses Delavin.  Everyone is aware that the young lady expressed her fondness to the 15 or 16-year-old Fil-Italian teen.

Does being an only child, a big factor of how Kisses acts? Is she playing the “Victim Card” as some Netizens claim? Let me share some information from the books and blogs I read. (Even regular people can do informative/educational research; ‘Google’ is free to everyone who has Internet access, so you are free to counter-research mine for educational purpose and exchange of ideas).

Who are only children?

Only Children is more egocentric than most people.

When you basically spend your entire childhood in a house with only adults — who you couldn't possibly relate to — you tend to direct your focus inwards and on yourself. When you don't have any brothers or sisters to play, learn and share with, you build yourself an ego — an ego that is too often reinforced by parents raising an only child. It's easy to spoil an only child; it's much more affordable. Of course, not all, only children are spoiled by their parents. Nevertheless, growing up without someone your age to share your parents' attention with does affect a child.

Only Children Are Artistic And Creative

Only children will spend a lot of time on their lonesome. No parent has time to spend all day with his or her child and wouldn't choose to do so even if he or she did; parents want some time to themselves just like every other person. Being an only child often forces you to rely more on your imagination, which matures into creativity with age.

Only Children Crave Constant Attention

They're used to getting regular attention from their parents and are likewise likely to develop that need for attention further when forced to make friends outside their family. Often at times, you will find that only children are the centers of social circles. They have a need for attention, and if they can't get it by making friends, they find other ways to get it. Everybody likes a bit of attention, but only children tend to crave it more. This gets tricky as only children likewise like their personal space. This is why you will often find only children harder to get close to, to convince to open up. This is also the reason why them getting their personal space will often turn into them satisfying their need for attention from a different source.

They’re hard to hold down. They crave attention, require their freedom and are quick to get up and leave if it means protecting their egos.

Only Children Needs To Be Adored All The Time

Most only children grew up the center of attention. Being spoilt with all the things in the world, the praises and attention they crave, the reassurance from time to time again that she/he is amazing, beautiful, strong, smart, awesome… you get the picture. When they will explore a relationship outside their parents, they’ll need someone who will also tell those things and in return, they will reciprocate the compliments they are receiving.

Only Children Takes Ownership Very Serious

Obviously, the best relationships strike a healthy balance between the times you spend with your significant other and how you prefer to devote the rest of your time. Dating only children comes with a hefty amount of selfishness. Of course, it’s adorable. Once you start dating only children, you become just another thing they don’t want to share — it’s what makes them such impassioned lovers and territorial friends. It won’t always be the healthiest quality in them.

Only Children Constantly Feel Sorry and Compare Themselves To Others

They usually struggle with the habit of comparing themselves to others negatively. Because we crave for attention and we easily get hurt we tend to play the “victim card” to attract sympathy.

Only children have a habit of pitying themselves. Their mirror reflects a defenseless child that cannot fend for their self. Since other people do not usually show them sympathy or empathy, they try to plea or give it to themselves, only to potentially appear immature to others. This further traps them in the victim role. Playing the victim card can easily secure exceptional support,  a human being is sympathetic and empathetic by nature. This can turn around the situation in several cases in favor of the one playing the victim. But it is unethical. And it is efficient if you are bad in acting.

The perception of only children being socially maladjusted, narcissistic, and spoiled is universal.

Signs Someone Is Always Playing The Victim

They Get Into Arguments Easily

The victim has trouble choosing their battles. To them, every battle is a war. To them, they are under attack all the time.

They Are A Critic

A person who loves to play as a victim has a need to put others down and find fault in people. By doing these things, they get a fleeting sense of superiority.

They Think They Are Perfect

Ironically, when there is a chance that a victim could be caught in an error, they suddenly become perfect. This arrogance and narcissism closes the victim off from having truly trustworthy and cooperative relationships.

They Cut People Out Of Their Life

“I’ve had it – they are out of my life for good!” If you’ve heard that statement before and it wasn’t in reference to an actually dangerous or abusive situation, then you’re probably dealing with a victim. Rather, this statement was likely made in reference to everyday behaviors and relationship problems the victim finds challenging. In response to this, their default strategy is to cut people out of their lives. This highly emotional behavior creates chaotic relationships.

Alas, playing the victim card is their remedy of choice. They’re poisoning themselves, and they don’t even know it.

A person who is fond of using the victim card needs to recognize their pattern of cutting people off. Cutting people off usually doesn’t lead to the resolution of problems and conflict. They could always take a different, more positive approach, such as letting people know their feelings instead.

In the end, the victim will end up facing painful consequences in their lives and relationships if they do not change their behavior.

As with most things in life, alternative options are there, we just have to be willing to look for them and make a start.

Before I end this, I am not stating or saying that all of the above information about “Only Children” and “Playing Victim” card is describing Kisses Delavin. Whether her supporters will agree or not, she is a public figure now and when she was inside the PBB house with all the 24/7 live stream online together with the recent incident with Marco Gallo, we did have a glimpse of who is Kisses Delavin.

Kisses Delavin is too fragile and the Star Magic should make a better game plan for this young lady to survive in this cruel industry. Viewers nowadays are audacious and cruel, they will recognize if you always play the victim card. If Kisses will not play her card well she will not be spared. She needs to hone her craft more instead of involving herself with an unnecessary drama of life. Sympathy is given to a person who needs them; don’t solicit it by always playing it.

Love this or hate this blog entry, It is just an observation of a “Virtual Stroller”